Friday, July 29, 2005

some people you just love them forever.

seeing the photo that you took with her really gave me the closure i desperately needed.

Be happy BPZ.

i think its 12:25 AM now

you're the picture behind the threadmill -

the one i'm trying to run away from .

i think its 12:18 AM now

i never believed in long distance relationships. for me, it was always 'out of sight, out of mind'. so how come i'm so wraped up with someone a million miles away?

how come my heart leaped into my throat when aol told me you signed on ?

how come 13 hours make so much difference ?

Slow down
i just wanna get to know you
But don't turn around
'Cuz that pretty round thing looks good to me
Now turn around
And bless me with your beauty
oh cutie

ruddy nus bidding system. fuddled my already-fuddled brain. jan should become a teacher. i didnt know hippopotamuses were that patient

i think its 12:17 AM now

Thursday, July 28, 2005

you're not here but it's OK~~~~

i watched sin city on the plane!!! yay its R21 so bite me! jessica alba is so so so so hooooot. download it, buy the pirated dvd whatever, just watch it. its R21 for a good reason -winks.

my hair is honey now. :) am gonna do blond highlights. bangkok is damn boring okay? friggin BORING. i didn't buy a single piece of clothing. nope, not a single one. amazing i tell you. everything is damn laopok. the only good part was the Thai spa and massage; the girl broke allll my bones. remind me to never go to bangkok Ever again. -folds arms.

oh, i bought alot of bras and panties. the ck panties there are damn cheap.

how many times did i say damn?

i think its 9:59 AM now

Thursday, July 21, 2005

it takes more than physical attraction*

zouk last night. i can't really remember anything afterward.. met many vjcians. zouk is getting packed with alot of xiao meimei and xiao didi. and the music SUCKED. like seriously. they should import that dj from new york.

i am going to live in a SHOEBOX

went for check-up with janelle. my urinary tract stops functioning properly under immense stress and pressure to pee.

i can't wait to pass my driving. she says she's gonna buy me a car once i pass. i'm eyeing this and that, but i'll be happy with a toyota corolla. :))

the Lexus IS is grogeous. GORGEOUS. Maxda MX5 is too! hmph.

i think its 12:50 PM now

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

my mom wants to jet me off to bangkok this saturday. she used Rama Gardens to tempt me. she knew i'd get tempted. sneak. i'm going ONLY because Gardens is the best hotel in bangkok and its 6 stars. ******

you know how much i hate bangkok. its hot, its smelly and its shopping ain't that great. (not after new york, anyway)

i really wanna make it for moony's bday this sunday. :(((

i'm enchanted by harry pothead.

LATERS !

i think its 10:45 PM now

Sunday, July 17, 2005

i went to new york again.

i think its 12:31 PM now

Friday, July 15, 2005

how can you survive a relationship like that ?
-
maybe one day - one day, when i'm brave enough, i'll send that song to you, i'll sing it to you, and then you'll know how i really feel.

Pictionary is funfun. -raises hands. okay i'm the worst draw-er Ever.

i'm dead tired. i think the rain is making my back ache. i hate AOL. i hate AOL.

i think its 10:32 PM now

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

am suffering from serious GYLC withdrawal symptoms. ):

i wanna wake up at 0530 and have the warm sun streaking into our dorm room
i wanna rush to the bathroom and wrangle bathroom space with my roommates
i wanna stare at the warzone that is my suitcase, and spend 20 mins deciding what to wear
i wanna hear lynette knock on my door with that door code rhythm (HAHA)
i wanna rush to the dining hall and eat eggs and bacon and bagel for breakfast

i wanna sprint all the way to LGM meetings, late and panting
i wanna discuss about issues i never gave a damn about
i wanna pass love notes around, sniggering behind Henry's back
i wanna do the bus count again.. THIRTYSEVEN!!
i wanna dance on the bus, getting scolded by Smiley for standing up
i wanna go to boring places and listen to boring talks
i wanna eat alot at dinner, and then pig out at night
i wanna pop the popcorn in the microwave, burn the whole damn thing, have smoke fill the entire room, setting off the smoke alarm, and have the entire floor rush outside and see our room puffing with thick smoke
i wanna sleep on the bus and take pictures of people sleeping on the bus

i wanna see brooklyn bridge
i wanna see the manhatten skyline from the brooklyn bridge
i wanna see couples holding hands
i wanna play dai dee with them on the co-ed floor ONLY
i wanna shower for 5 mins and throw my jammies on and head straight to bed
i wanna have to sleep on a small, single bed with rough sheets and even rougher springs

i wanna eat a 30 min lunch and spend the remaining hour speed-shopping
i wanna eat ben & jerry's at Pentagon City
i wanna see a starbucks at every corner block
i wanna spot lynette and janelle and feel like i've seen home
i wanna chat endlessly with my group mates
i wanna chew gum until my jaw feels numb
i wanna have joshua and justin to hug me very randomly in the middle of the day

i wanna see Times Square from my hotel room
i wanna jump up and down at MTV's TRL in vain hope that the camera will catch us
i wanna walk up and down the same street and never get tired of the bursting energy
i wanna get lost in Soho and take the 2 dollar subway
i wanna take the ultra-sleek elevators in Marriot

i WANT MY CHOCOLATE MILKSHAKE

i want to go back to new york. :((

i think its 10:31 PM now

Monday, July 11, 2005

what happens in new york, stays in new york.

i really love that song we heard at cine's pool today you know?

after being pimple-free for 3 weeks, one very irritating (and painful) pimple managed to find its way onto my forehead. but i like caressing it

the mother offered to hire me a driver so that i won't have to stay in hostel.. i'm gonna miss home!!

sometimes days like today make all the fights, all the tears, all the wait, very worth it.

Li Sheng Jie - Chi Xin Jue Dui

i think its 10:24 PM now

Sunday, July 10, 2005

it's driving me crazy.

YOU're driving me crazy.

i think its 2:35 PM now

Saturday, July 09, 2005

lynette. janelle. me. fantastic four.

crystal jade xiaolongbao is yummy! i realized the more i eat the more weight i lose. hmm.

WHERE ARE YOU ??????

i think its 11:16 PM now

Thursday, July 07, 2005

awesome. bloody awesome.

it had been the best 18 days of my life.

Day 1 was horrible. was jet-lagged and we had to attend alot of meetings immediately. found out i have been assigned to Sierra Leone, which i haven't heard of until then, thereafter was handed a huge GYLC handbook with lots of reading. called my mom and dad, cried my heart out. it kinda helped a little that the George Washington campus was gorgeous and the weather was perfect.

Slept at 12 at woke up at 5 over the course of the next few days. don't wish to bore you here about the stuffs that we did at the Leadership Group Meetings. there were plenty of talks which i basically a)fell asleep at b)doodled my life away c)spot cute people

there was a David Beckham, Lindsay Lohan, Brooke Burke, Keanu Reeves etc. there was this Lebanonese girl that seriously looked like a Zara model.

went to US Department of State and the Zimbabwe embassy on Day 3. spent at least US$25 for every lunch. the people there are filthy rich. everyone has an iPod. everyone wears J.crew and cK. i constantly felt like a washed-out cow. :S

World Bank, White House and National Museum of American History the next day. bought lotsa Victoria's Secret for my mom. and myself! HEH. was at the Abercrombie and Fitch store at georgetown when i bought 10 tops. made a huge crater in my card of course. but i was told beforehand by my mom that "go ahead and buy 20 t-shirts from A&F for me" so.there.

lots of stimulations and resolution-passing over the next few days. and i became closer to my group mates. Guatemela, Argentina, Kentucky, Germany, Venezuela, Norway. they come from every damn place in the world. we went to the French Embassy for a diplomatic reception on thursday but it was really just a high school mingling session. Lincoln, Korean war and Vietnam war memorial at night, had heart-to-heart talks by the lake with quinnie from canada. started to slang more because they couldn't understand my singlish. they were highly amused by the lors and lahs. i, on the other hand, felt so abashed.

Pentagon City on Day 6 and the best non-boring musuem tour was at the U.S Holocaust Musuem. it was engaging but at the same time depressing, to see how the Jews were treated. we were all somewhat affected by the gruesome pictures such that we sat in stony silence the rest of the bus ride back to campus. it was intense. to see the statistics of how many people died is one thing; to see what actually happened and how mentally retarded kids were gassed to death is another. it was Hitler's interpretation of Darwin's theory - survival of the fittest. what bull?

left for New york city on saturday!! stopped by Philadelphia, dripped chocolate all over my jeans. ewww. the vietnam guys took photos of me while i was sleeping. i thought i look kinda nice. haha

this kinda sticks out but everyone started hooking up. wtf? pfft.

anyway, i was assigned to the International Law commission for the Global Summit and had to draft resolutions for combatting terrorism. i thought it was dumb, negotiating with other countries, arguing and demanding that the resolution be passed in our favour. realized that the US really does have a lot of veto power and smaller countries such as Sierra Leone have no say in almost everything.

there were evening socials every night and i really got to see how american high school's like. hell, there was even a girl on my bus named Lauren who was a head cheerleader and appeared on ESPN before. tall, blonde, tanned, rich, loud. how typical.

took long night walks around the campus with you - it was so much fun sneaking away from the the faculty advisors and then sneaking back to the dorm rooms before inspection at 11. we always managed to get back in time. (:

ate ALOT, especially at manhattan college in the bronx, cuz it was buffets every breakfast and dinner. pizzas, potatoes, chips, meat, meat and more meat. surprisingly i dropped 2kg. must have been all the walking. had the best time with lynette and janelle. though we couldn't see each other much cuz lyn's in the China group and janelle the australia group, we tried to hang out during breakfast and dinner. laughed so hard with rueben, lynette and youyou one night that we all ended up lying flat on the dorm corridor. youyou is soooo cute. she's from china.

went to the guggenheim and central park on Day 9. was kinda bummed cuz i put Ellis Island (where will smith shot Stitch and where the statue of liberty is) as my first choice and someone was not going with me. Humphf. South street seaport for lunch, yet another 30 bucks out my pocket.

*i remember the light rain, the songs from the gospel chior, and i remember spotting you across the cobbled streets, squinting your eyes from the sun. for the split second when our eyes locked, i felt the world around me drop dead and stop spinning.*

went to Times Sqaure to watch The Phantom of the Opera on Broadway. it was fucking brilliant. broadway! musical! we only had 45 mins to roam in times sqaure and everyone was complaining cuz, well, you don't get to be in times sqaure everyday, do you?

it was the Global Summit the last day at the United Nations. our resolution got passed :)) went into all the conference rooms and the one where Nicole kidman filmed the Interpreter. then it was lunch at Rockefellar Center.

rushed back to campus to doll up for the GYLC Farewell celebration cruise. i thought it'd be a formal, sit-down dinner but it turned out to be a full-swing party skip-the-dinner dance. it felt like chinablack, only with alot more wobbling and alot less dirty army boys. had the most fun in months dirty dancing with my group mates and we got kinda high when 1,2 step started playing cuz we were singing it throughout the trip, thanks to me. haha

the couples were going at it on the dance floor and the music started to turn ugly so everyone started to drift away.

it was undoubtedly romantic, standing on the upper deck with you as the boat cruised down the Hudson river and passed the Statue of Liberty, her bright lights gleaming in the velvet sky.

i almost forgot the exhilarating feeling with someone new
i almost forgot the shy and awkward glances
i almost forgot how i suddenly seem so aware of my hands and legs
i almost forgot that electrifying feeling
i almost forgot the first kisses

i almost forgot how it felt like to have my heart thump at a jillion times per second.

and the giddyness. not from the boat but from you.

hugging you felt like the most natural thing in the world. i couldn't care less about anything else.

i could stare at you forever; memorizing how the blue in your eyes swirled in the deep mahagony brown. memorizing how your dark lashes arch with disregard to gravity; memorizing how your auburn hair curled at the bottom of your neck.

when you told me we'll keep in touch, you knew there is no possible way. yet i managed to find it in me to believe you.

the only person i couldn't believe was myself.

when we said our goodnights at the lobby, i knew by tomorrow morning, it'd be gone.

i went back to my room and stood in the hot shower for the longest time. stayed up till 3 talking to my room mates.

indeed, it was gone the next morning. it took all of my will to pull my arms away from you as your bus to JFK came and i remember staring at it until it was a speck in the distance.

said our teary goodbyes to everyone with promises to email, call, visit etc.. i felt so empty it was unbelievable. i came 2 weeks ago without an inkling i'd find one of the best memories.

was visibly cheered when Alan, our driver, came to pick me, janelle and lynette in a black Merz! mom booked a room for us at the Marriott in Times Square and we found out MTV TRL is just beside us!!!! the malaysians and the twins from south africa stayed with us till evening when they had to fly off. we grew quite close to the malaysians mainly due to the fact that they are from the international school and thus, do not act and talk like malaysians at all. and Joshua's dad is the famous billionaire YTL and Rueben's parents are chairman and CEO of the travel agent Reliance in malaysia. there you go. rich heirs. but they were humble and gentlemanly, and very much unlike singaporean males. :)

we were on our own for the next few days. went to fifth avenue, walked up and down times square.. shopped like crazy; i depleted the 1800 USD my mom gave me, excluding all the countless times i signed my card. oh well.

after janelle left, me and lynette took the subway down to Soho and Greenwich village for an entire day and got LOST. it was hilarious. it felt really good to be wandering alone in new york city, no parents, no curfews. it has got to be the best place to shop. not the cheapest, but the best. we were constantly pinching ourselves to make sure we weren't dreaming. day-dreaming yes? -sly smile.

did some pretty crazy stuff thanks to lynette. that girl's crazy i swear. i feel like i can do anything when i'm with her. and it certainly felt like we've known each other forever. even our driver asked us if we've known each other since we were kids?

some things, and some people change your life forever.

i think its 10:26 AM now

i can't find any other word more fitting than "nice", because that's what it was. talking to lynette over magaritas at Applebee's in Times Square. although we got totally ripped off. but we always get ripped off don't we? like how we each paid US$33 for 6 hours at the transit hotel in korea. like all the mineral water bottles. like the ridiculously expensive mickey mouse shirt. subway ticket. taxi fares. hotdogs.

i had a blast. the pictures will explain themselves.

i bought:
12 abercrombie t-shirts
2 abercrombie jeans
1 MTV shirt
punk'd cap
H&M boxers
DKNY skirt
DKNY tie-dyed men's shirt
Ralph lauren cardigan
ralph lauren sleeveless polo
miss sixty skirt
miss sixty jeans
2 ax shirts
2 ck shirts
old navy pajamas!
1 juicy couture flip flops
3 old navy flip flops
victoria secret lingerie
2 lacoste tops
1 bcbg maxazira skirt (i swear i didn't know the price or i wouldn't have bought it)
another ax top
1 diesel belt
OC jacket
3 ck panties!
countless accessories
useless stuffs such as tissue papers that has the US dollar print
statue of liberty magnet
a condom in the lollipop that says "no glove, no love"
a wrist band that says "****" (no, not fuck okay)

and i bought a black leather Coach bag for my mom.

NO MORE SHOPPING FOR THE NEXT 10 YEARS PLS

//don't look no farther
baby i'm back here
i'm here to cater to you

i think its 10:15 AM now

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

i think its 1:35 PM now